Part of growing up is learning to balance different personalities and ways of doing things.
When we’re little, we live with our parents and (maybe) our siblings and we learn the ins and outs of who they are almost by accident. For example I learned to not to leave toiletries out on the shared bathroom countertops and my brother learned to put the toilet seat down; we didn’t have to talk about it, we just came to understand each other’s preferences over time.
But every new person you meet comes with their own set of preferences and personalities traits; it’s not habitual anymore. So you either learn to adapt to them for the sake of getting along…or you don’t.
Today I want to talk about my pet peeves, the things that really dig under my skin and make it hard for me to get along with people. I’m sure there are things about me (other than my bluntness which I recently wrote about) that bother other people, too.
Pet Peeve: something that a particular person finds especially annoying.
I really dislike it when people text me from the next room. If I’m clearly awake (i.e. playing music, watching TV, etc.) please for the love of Marvel, just knock on my door and ask me your question.
Passive aggressive texting/note leaving also really bothers me. If you’re not confident enough to say something to my face, don’t bother texting it to me with a fake smiley face emoji after it. Your false “haha” or “lol” does nothing to mitigate what you’re saying; in fact, it just makes me more irritated at your choice of delivery. Just say what you have to say in person or not at all please.
Continuous negativity can also be frustrating. We all have bad days and friendship is about supporting one another, but the burdens need to be spread about equally. Sure, you may have really hit a bad spell – maybe your student loans are giving you trouble, maybe you just lost your job – but giving in to negativity just makes you unpleasant to be around and can be hard on the people who care about you. Try and find something positive to hold onto in the short term and then bust your butt working to get things sorted again so that you can be there, ready and able when someone else needs to rely on you in turn. When it’s always about you, your presence is more toxic than supportive to the group as a whole.
All this I can live with, though. It’s annoying, but bearable. Disrespect is where I draw the line. It’s my biggest pet peeve. I cannot tolerate people who either by doing one of the above things or by some other means, blatantly disrespect someone else. We are all people and we need to respect one another no matter what’s going on in our own lives or what differences may lie between us. Whenever I see someone taking out their bad day on a waitress or salesperson, I always get really upset because there’s no justifiable reason for that. I get equally upset when people use anonymity on the Internet to spew hateful comments towards people they disagree with or when people disrespect themselves by believing they’re not worthy of love and happiness. Because no one person has all the right answers; we all need each other.
So what are your pet peeves? Let me know down in the comments what really drives you bananas.