From the start I knew that we would never work out.
But I liked the way that you were from someplace completely different than me. It gave me a window into your world when I’d only ever known mine.
I also liked the way you threw yourself into your work and your lifestyle and how excited you’d get to try something new. Your enthusiasm was like a magnet to someone who was jaded about their day job.
And I liked the way you made your pre-existing friendships a priority, but were still excited to meet new people. My friends are everything to me and it made me more comfortable around you to know that you were comfortable around them.
I liked the way you seemed to get me, too. When I got nervous, you picked up the slack in conversation and when I got silly you not only ran with the twists of my personality, but enjoyed them.
You made it easy for me to like you, but I know that it never would have worked out.
We were total opposites in a way that would have meant disaster down the road. We would have disagreed on lots of crucial things that I know are important to me. Maybe we never said it aloud, but I knew it and I think you did, too.
So amongst the silly Star Wars debates and conversations about our favorite books, we never paused too long or thought too much about what we were or where we were going. We just enjoyed spending time with one another. That’s why we can leave this on a happy note, as friends if no longer anything more.
So I want to thank you as I say goodbye.
I want to thank you for reminding me how to breathe and how to be myself with someone else. It’d been so long that I’d honestly forgotten, and I needed not to be frozen with anxiety every time someone showed interest.
I want to thank you for reminding me what it’s like to care about someone besides myself, to crave someone else’s opinions, time, and laughter. Without knowing it, you reminded me that caring about someone else doesn’t mean caring about myself less; my heart just grew bigger to accommodate us both.
I want to thank you for being kind and patient with me, for teaching me the things I didn’t know without making me feel dumb, and for always being honest. I’ve never been the kind of girl to want to play games and you made it clear that I could always be up front with you. We both prefered that level of honesty and it made things easier and lighter and happier between us.
And I want to thank you for being the kind of friend only you could be. In a sea of un-extraordinary people, you made it exciting to get to know you. You’re a true gentleman, a goofball, and a complete nerd in not-quite disguise; a diamond in the rough.
We never would have worked out, but I will never regret you. You were everything I needed, exactly when I needed it, and I will always wish you happiness.