Late last night I emailed my mom. I said:
“I feel inexplicably happy right now. For the first time in weeks it’s like I can breathe. I don’t know what I did differently, but after this weekend I just feel so much more like myself. Maybe it’s that I’ve been trying to spend time with different people or maybe it’s all the extra vitamin D I’ve been getting, but I just feel really good right now.”
The truth is that I feel better than I have in a long time. I didn’t feel bad before, but this feels like a different kind of happy. I feel somehow lighter, like someone’s lifted a weight off my shoulders that I didn’t even know was there.
And it’s funny because nothing has really changed. All the problems that I had last week still exist, but I’m not so consumed with them anymore. When I think on them now, they seem distant and I’m so beyond ok with that. I’ve never wanted to be a pessimist, never wanted my emotions to weigh me down. Right now, I feel totally free of them.
Over the long weekend I treated myself to three days of me-time. I slept in, went swimming at the pool, finished a book, learned to make burgers, saw an outdoor movie, started a great new TV show, and generally kind of just lived in the moment. Maybe this has something to do with how I feel or maybe not, but the fact is that I feel amazing right now. For the first time in ages I just feel like I got to be myself and do stuff that makes me happy and I’ll do anything to keep it this way.
How was your holiday weekend? Let me know in the comments down below!